Wednesday, July 8, 2009

I Want to Bait This Man


The offices of Details magazine are clearly are located inside the bowels of my warped mind. Last issue featured the hotness of Bradley Cooper on the cover (sitting in my kitchen as I type) 


Now editors have gifted me yet again by putting my TV husband Jason Bateman on the cover.


Shit, yo. Who needs an analyst or therapist or an analrapist when you have this to get you through the day? Cash is tight right now but there's always money in the banana stand so this magazine will be mine. Even if it means taking a chubby, I will suck it up. I just hope I don't get to the store before the issue hits newstands. I don't want to prematurely blow my load and what was supposed to be a dry run and then have quite a mess on my hands.

When this issue is out, you should pick it up, sit back with some hot ham water, or get a stew going and read up on the Bateman, maybe while drinking some juice. Juice? This party is gonna be off the hook!

In the mag, J-Bate talks about being a child star, going out of control with booze and blow in his late teens and 20s as well as the best thing of all....the status of an Arrested Development movie saying;

"We're gonna make the movie...Mitch Hurwitz is just starting to write it. It'll be out in a year and a half." 

Yessss!!!!!!! 

I'm so glad George Michael (not the singer/songwriter) stopped being such a punk ass bitch and signed on, I was beginning to think he got off on withholding but he's for sure, for sure on board. After all, there's no 'i' in 'Teamocil' at least not where you'd think. 

In celebration of this most glorious news, feast your eyes upon some of the delicious Bateman eye candy from Details;

Yeah, the guy in the $3000 suit is gonna hold the elevator for the guy who doesn't make that in four months....COME ON!!





Uhm....what does it say about me that I'd rather read Details than like, Cosmo or Vogue? Am I a guy in the brains? I don't understand the question and I won't respond to it. My gut is telling me no, but my gut is also very hungry...


Thanks for reading this, I know there are many other blogs out there, like the Bob Loblaw Law Blog for instance.

2 comments:

Shenannygans said...

I have nothing clever to say - I just love me some Jason Bateman!!! Keep this on the hook, DB.

nutmeg said...

Where in the world is Dirty Blonde? Her fans are starting to get concerned that he break up with vodka has hit her harder than expected. We miss you DB!