Spotted: Serena's Boobs

Here's Gossip Girl's Blake Lively at the Costume Institute Gala in NYC Monday night. That colour looks great on her and that one sleeve business actually doesn't bother me as much I originally thought it did. I think it's because I'm too distracted by her amazing boobs. Her character is the most boring on Gossip Girl and bitch speaks like she has a mouth full of marbles but fuck me running if this trick isn't totally gorgeous. I covet everything about her. I want to fatten her up and then make a Serena suit which I would wear. THIS IS SOME SILENCE OF THE LAMBS SHIT!!! Put the lotion in the basket!!

Bada ba ba ba I'm NOT Lovin' It

For like, five hot minutes this week there was talk that my love, JT had finally broken free from the shehulk clutches of Jessica Bile. And those five minutes, much like my boy Blue, were GLORIOUS.

Then these photos emerged from Tuesday night's Lakers game and shot that all to hell. Cry me a river, indeed..

JESSICA BIEL



Perhaps it's my pure, seething, unadulterated jealousy that she is banging Justin Timberlake but I hate everything about Jessica Biel's look. It's difficult to tell in this photo but on TV her hair looked sloppier than hell and I hate this dress with its built-in bib. As one of my friends said during our Oscar get-together, "Is she going for lobster right after the show?" At least we know she'd have no problem cracking open the lobsters with those shehulk arms. Yeah, I'm jealous. Suck it.