Before the Miley Virus infected us all with a face annoying enough to send me into an inexplicably violent Virginia Tech-style ragestorm upon its mere sight, there was this punk ass poseur trick. Avril Lavigne is proof positive that douchebags come in female form too. When I saw this picture I had a frightening thought;What if, after Avril and her pocket rocker husband Deryck Whibley break up (cause they all do) she took up with John Mayer? Their combined douche forces would form some sort of super strength strain of douche, like an explosion of douchebaggery. It would be cataclysmic and would rock the Earth to her very core. It would have disastrous and far-reaching effects, the likes of which we'd be powerless to fight. Suddenly we'd all be spray tanned within an inch of or lives, clad in bedazzled Ed Hardy and Affliction gear, posing for photos whilst giving the middle finger and gang symbols. We'd go off on long-winded emo tangents, about how we're misunderstood and the world is against us.
An Avril Lavigne/John Mayer hookup would spell the end of humanity as we know it. It simply cannot happen.
No comments:
Post a Comment